Makeover, stat!


MAN I had a full morning. It’s one of those days where everything I’ve procrastinated about in the last six months attacked me at once. The highlight was when I’d just finished walking my daughter to Kindergarten, done the shopping, and was walking up Mount Everest pulling a packed shopping trolley, deep in thought about another errand I was on the way to do when a woman came out of a Kiosk and demanded I give her her morning paper. My entire body was one giant “Excuse me?” She told me there was a woman who lived up on the hill by the doctor who was responsible for the newspapers in her neighborhood and I looked enough like this woman to be her twin.

Hello? First off, I live up on the hill by the doctor and I go out on foot quite a bit, but I’m pretty sure I’ve never carried newspapers in this country. Secondly, carrying the newspaper is a job they either give to teenagers or people who’re working off state help. Which, may I say clearly, is honest work done by honest people who’re making an effort. I have absolutely nothing derogatory to say about that. BUT, it’s an outside job, a strenuous one in a town where every street is either straight up or straight down, and you don’t do that kind of thing and come out of it looking elegant. In fact you look like you just got done running a 10k.

I think I’d better seriously consider what kind of image I’m projecting to my neighborhood and fast. Mama needs to start workin’ on her style.

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